The anniversary of Dad’s death is approaching. My grief  is never really that far away, but the week leading up to October 24th seems to give my grief permission to invade my life and grow stronger the closer it gets to the anniversary date. Over the last few years it has been a struggle to “celebrate” my birthday when the memories of my last birthday with Dad still seem so fresh. October 18, 2011, was the last time I celebrated with dad. How could I know a week later, he would be gone.

We gathered at the table like we did every year for by birthday, candles and cake, flowers and balloons, cards and gifts. Except this time, dad was bald from the radiation treatment. His full head of curly hair was the only thing missing that day.  The memory of  his laughter and singing “Happy Birthday” will be with me always and even though I sob each time I watch these video clips, I feel dad’s love and spirit here with me.

Sharing these bitter sweet treasures of October 18, 2011 my last birthday with dad…