I’ve been thinking about a dad a lot these last few days. His birthday is tomorrow, September 16th and I find myself getting emotional during this time since he’s been gone. I started to think about all the celebrations we had for Father’s Day and birthdays. Those were not celebrations to be missed. No matter what was going on or where we all were in life, we all seemed to find the time to show up.

It didn’t matter if we were at a restaurant, in the backyard of someone’s house, or just sitting at his kitchen table in his apartment. He didn’t want anything fancy, just us coming together. Gatherings for dad were about celebrating him being the dad and grandpa we needed him to be, not about decorations or presents. Don’t get me wrong, there were presents of all kinds, “best dad” t-shirts, #1 Grandpa hats, coffee mugs, shoes, nice dress shirts and the occasional 6 pack of beer. He would sit back and unwrap his gifts and read every card. I do miss card shopping for Dad. I would take my time to find the right cards from me and the kids. I knew he read them all. He treasured each one, maybe more than his gifts.

A couple of years ago, I was going through some of dads things and came across a shoe box full of cards. As soon as I finished reading one card, I couldn’t stop crying.  I closed the box up and put it away for another day. I wasn’t ready.

Today, I decided to try looking through the box of cards again. I figured since I wasn’t going to be card shopping for dad, maybe I could read the carefully chosen cards for dad.

I emptied the box out and spread the cards out on the floor of his old room. I cried like a baby, then of course I sorted and organized  and then I read every card and every hand written note he saved. They were well taken care of, all looked brand-new. It was not a surprise, but I found several of his voter registration cards mixed in the box. There were also graduation invitations that he cherished and did his best to attend, even when it was hard to get around. Education came first to dad, always and he would be there to celebrate if he could.

Dad also had several “Thank You” cards for his generosity and friendship. Our former neighbors Sandy and John became friends with my dad and were always finding ways to thank him for being a good neighbor. That was dad. He would find a way to be helpful and kind to anyone. He started a neighborly tradition that whoever woke up first and picked up their newspaper from the driveway, they would take pick up their neighbors paper from their driveway and put it on their doorstep to save them steps. The funny thing was that dad was an early riser and Ms. Sandy and Mr. John were late sleepers so it was always my dad delivering their paper just like the mailman he used to be.
But the card I came across that really just epitomized dad’s pampering of people in his life was from a long-time family friend and his banker, Renee. He knew how to take care of the people who provided good service to him.

There were also cards wishing him a speedy recovery, thinking of you and welcome home that just kept the tears coming.

How cute were the “Grandpa” cards and poster?! The kids really enjoyed picking out cards for him because they knew he enjoyed getting them.

There were so many Father’s Day and Birthday cards that were chosen just for him. It was overwhelming and beautiful all at the same time. Dad made us all feel special. He was the dad we each needed him to be, even if it wasn’t exactly at the time we needed him, he showed up anyway and then he stayed put. Dad became my anchor when I felt like I was floating away, my confidant when I felt alone in the world, my cheerleader when I doubted myself, my shoulder to cry on when my heart hurt and my example to parent with unconditional love.

I could feel all the love, admiration and appreciation jump right off of those cards and into my heart.  I wondered if that’s what dad felt and if that’s why he kept all these cards